Monday, March 6, 2017

Gift Giving And Autism

Welcome to AuSumness.

Autism isn't always awesome, but there sure are many attributes that give people with autism something special and unique.  For me, one of the best things about autism is how it makes me look at everything differently.  Certainly, outside of the box thinking is required and I feel like I'm improving a lot as a person because both my boys have autism.

Last week, we got into different ways that friends and family can help us and our kids.  I shared a story about my mother-in-law getting a bit emotional when JJ totally freaked at the money gift he received.  I'm talking full blown melt down.

My mother-in-law took it personal.  You should never take it personal. One of the biggest problems that people with autism have is inappropriate social behaviour.  My children are rarely grateful for the gift they receive despite us teaching them that they should be.  We show them by example continuously and it just doesn't help.  As with so many other things.  If that's something all parents go through, is the constant repetition in the correction of behaviour.  How many of you have to say, "Honey, stay seated while we we're eating"?  Seriously, we've been saying this for over a decade now and at least 5 times for every meal.

All right!  We've said not to take it personal, but that doesn't mean that you have to ignore the behaviour either.  Of course, if you're not going to say something helpful, then ignoring them would be best.  Hehehehe...However, there certainly isn't anything wrong with letting that person know that your feelings are hurt by their reaction.  Just don't expect that you will get an apology.

Remember, some people need TIME to get used to a new gift.  My youngest certainly falls into this category.  He might throw a present and even hide it, but three days later, he goes to bed with it and can't put it down.  JJ needs time to look at it, feel it, even taste it before he can begin to appreciate it.  So please, if you get a negative response when giving a gift, don't take it to heart.  Tomorrow, they just might LOVE it.

I would totally recommend asking that person or the parent what a suitable gift might be.  Especially, if ya think you're going to be upset at a negative reaction.

Last week I suggested that you should consider not making someone else's behaviour all about yourself.  I certainly don't blame the gift giver for my child's reaction to a present.

I've written a blog on giving and going to a special needs party. If you're interested in that, click here.

Hopefully our tips and explanations will help smooth things out and make everyone's life a bit less stressful.

Thanks for stopping by.  If you'd like to join me and some of my other friend's whose children have autism, hit up our group on Facebook.

Best of luck!

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