Free Summer Buck List Printables

Welcome to AuSumness.

Every Monday we bring helpful tips, share our experience and shine a positive light on life with Autism.

On my other blog, The Cherry On Top, I share digital and traditional scrapbooking projects along with tutorials and freebies.   That's where I posted these originally, but thought they would go great here, too.

These Summer Bucket lists are keeping my Autistic boys in mind.  I don't have any kind of project that my youngest might want to eat (that shouldn't be eaten) and the level of frustration should be none to minimal.  All of the crafty ideas can be found on our "For The Kids" board on Pinterest where you can get tutorials and instructions.  All of them are keeping money in mind, too.

As you may have experienced, keeping the kids busy is the key to everyone's happiness.  Be prepared with long hours of activities and if possible, give choices.  Maybe you'd rather make your own list and use our list as a guide or a starting point.

This first list is for younger kids.  Both lists use Open Dyslexic.  A font specifically geared towards dyslexia.  It makes reading less complicated for both of my boys.

This list if for older kids.  Most of the activities are free.

Make sure you check out our boards on Pinterest to add to your summer or boredom busters.  When the kids start complaining about being bored, I give them a list of options.  If that doesn't work, I put them to work.  Hehehe...  Another idea, is to have them clean out their closest of stuff they don't want.  I've also noticed when I gather a box of goodies they haven't played with for a while and tell them I'm getting rid of it, they play with it.  Ha!

Thanks for making AuSumness a part of your day.  Have a super summer!

Clothing Sensitivities and Autism

Welcome to AuSumness.

We got into some pretty good conversation in our Facebook group, about clothing sensitivities and our children with Autism.  Today, we'll look at some of those.  It may even be something you didn't notice and we'll also talk about ways to avoid issues.

It's debated about the possibility of minimising symptoms of Autism.  People do this in many forms.  Some ditch the gluten, sugar and dairy to help reduce Autistic symptoms while others go for a wholistic approach from changing the environment from city to country, improving diet and trying anything they might find that will help.

Clothing may be one of the easiest fixes to help relive symptoms of Autism.  Many people with Autism cannot wear any fabric except cotton.  Even organic cotton is a super option.  Me and my son cannot stand any kind of synthetic clothing.  

A few other things are zippers, buttons, belts, hats and gloves.  Go for all cotton with an elastic waist and snaps if you have to.  The more simple, the better.  If it is possible, stay away from garments that bring on stress.

I also have to cut the tags out of my boys shirts.  

If you have children that are nonverbal, this could be a bit tricky.  Keep your eyes out for the signs of irritation and also look for ticks.  Ticks can be from over stimulation, but they can also come from being uncomfortable both mentally and physically.

No matter how cold or hot, JJ could never wear a hat, scarf or gloves.  We tried for a while and occasionally would try again and again, but we'd never push the issue.  I bought a jacket that zipped all of the way up to his chin so we didn't need the scarf and we would use the hood of the jacket to protect his ears, when he'd let us.  His hands, he'd have to keep in his pockets.

Graphic designs on clothing may also upset your children.  I've found if I wasn't certain, I'd just buy plain clothes.  

JJ also does not like new clothes at all.  I've had to give away perfectly new, unused clothes.  Even to this day.   Purchasing plain clothing was a huge help.

Shoes are our biggest issue.  We have a very difficult time at the shoe store.  If we survive it, JJ often doesn't like his shoes once we are home or after he's worn them once or twice.  Make sure there is plenty of room and that they are easy to get off and on.

Do your kids love to be naked?  Our kids still prefer the natural look.  Hehehe...We indulge them at times, by letting them play naked in the rain, but they are required to wear underwear at all times.  As long as they are warm, we don't see a big problem with this for at home, of course.

Here are some things you may consider avoiding :

-  zippers
-  buttons
-  accessories like hats, belts, gloves, scarves
-  shoes with laces
-  synthetic clothing 
-  images on clothing

Pay attention to what the likes and dislikes are before purchasing clothing with graphics on them.  Make sure the tags are not bothering your children.  You may have to use some mild forms of bribery to get them to wear particular pieces, but keep their stress levels in mind and don't use this tactic too often or it will stop working.

Come on over to our group and join in on the conversation we have there.

Thanks for stopping by.
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Choosing Your Battles

Welcome to AuSumness.

It's a goal to have more entries on Autism.  We are shooting for every week since we've had such a lovely response to the ones we've here already.

We try to keep it as general as possible so our tips can perhaps help with folks all over the world and for those dealing with different kinds of levels on the spectrum.  If our tips don't work for you now, they might later.  We want to be as positive as possible in all of the aspects and would ask our readers to do the same.

Today, we want to focus on choosing your battles.  This was another tough lesson to learn, but once we got it, it's helped us tremendously.  I also used some of these techniques when I was a teacher in secondary education. 

You will totally stress yourself out and all of those around you if you continuously try to control everything.  Sometimes we just have to take a deep breath and then let go.  I'm getting really good at this.  Hehehe...  I often have to remind my husband to let it go, too.

You may find yourself going horse or feel a great strain in your throat after continuous yelling, correcting or arguing and then you know for sure, it's time to stop.  Give it a break.  That physical symptom is a super caliber as to when it's too much.

Seriously think to yourself, "is this a battle worth fighting?"  There are so many important things that you absolutely MUST fight.  For example, healthy eating.  This was such a problem for us years ago and still a bit today, but nothing like before.  Our boys are 9 and 10 and it is still impossible to get them to sit still at the table.  We decided that it was way more important to eat.  Just eat.  My oldest was fed while he drove around the table in his little push car.  We'd scoop a spoon full of something very healthy in his mouth, every time he rode by.

Some might think it ridiculous, but this kid would not eat.  The doctors were concerned because he was so under weight.  Eating was just not important to him. It still isn't, but that driving around the table didn't last long at all.  Think in baby steps, but always hold fast to the things that are really crucial like eating, sleeping, hygiene, safety, going to the toilet and of course school and studies. 

We still have a difficult time getting the kids to eat with utensils.  We never pushed the issue too, much and we still have to continuously remind them to use their forks, but it slowly gets better.  Some other battles that we chose not to fight are having a blanket, writing in cursive, being a couple of minutes late to school, shoe tying and blowing off steam.

My 9 year old still carries around his blanket during private time.  Blankets are great for feeling independent and we feel there are so many other things we are trying to make better, that this is one we can continue to ignore.  We often put his blanket away and he can go an entire day without it.  So again, it slowly gets better, too.

I told the teacher of my youngest, that we felt cursive wasn't at all important and that she shouldn't push the issue, but she may certainly keep encouraging him and introducing him to it.  Spelling and reading are very important and he's still not good in reading so we'd rather they focus on that.

Getting ready for school is pretty much a nightmare.  If we are in terrible meltdown mode, well guess what, school can wait.  I need to calm my child first so he doesn't hurt himself or others.  If we're a couple of minutes late a few times a year, the school just has to deal with it.

JJ still can't tie his shoes, but velcro is still an option.   We learned early that pushing or forcing is absolutely not the solution.  We're not fretting that he can't tie his shoes yet, but we are not giving up either because is it important and he really should learn this at some point.  

Forcing is something we are going to cover more in detail on another blog.

If you find yourself arguing or getting frustrated in a situation with your children or students, ask yourself if it's worth the fight.  When you find the things that are most important DO stick to those and don't give in.

We hope these tips that we've learned might help you, too and I want to personally thank all of you for your lovely comments.  We feel if we can help just one person in some way, it's all worth it.

I've got this link if you want to read more about power struggles and choosing battles.

Best of luck and if you have any questions, we'll see if we can't get you answers.

10 Alternatives To Tying Shoelaces

Welcome to AuSumness.

Sticking with Autism entries on Monday's, we're back with some images, links, a video tutorial and 10 alternatives to tying shoelaces.

Both of my boys have difficulties tying shoes.  My nine year old has melt downs at the mention of practicing this very important task.  It came up in conversation with a friend of mine who has the same problem with her daughter.  I showed her an image of some elastic type laces I found at our local Brantano shoe store, that we use with my oldest.  They are unbelievably easy to install and use.  She also showed me what she uses.  Both are included in the list.

All 10 of these would be a great substitute for traditional shoe laces.  They are also great for runners, bikers and other athletes as well as for anyone who has difficulty tying shoes.  Personally, I'd love an excuse to STOP running and tie my shoes.  Hehehe...

Each image is linked up to a place where you can get more information and or purchase the product.  Some have videos, too.

These are similar to what I purchased.  Further down is the exact brand.

These looked interesting.  I like the tactile feel.

These are called Hickies and you can get them all over the place in a variety of sizes and colours.

These look pretty good, too.  Very easy to use.

This is what we purchased.  Years later and they are still perfect.  No problems in the wash either.

These you lace through, cut and lock.

More elastic shoelaces.

A different kind of system that also doesn't require tying.

These are what my friend uses.  They have an awesome array of colours.

This is another great system using magnetics!  Easy on and off.

I found this video with a totally different tying technique that JJ might be able to do.  It looks really simple.  Take a peep.  It's only under one minute. I'll be sure to have something awesome for him before I even mention the idea of another shoe tying exercise.  We call it in Dutch, the stick behind the door.  (De stok achter de deur.) This may be bribery, but learning how to tie is something we feel is very important.  I was using chocolate pudding, but he hates this exercise so much, even that's not good enough any more.  Hehehe...  I may have to hang gaming time over his head this time.

Rewarding is for another entry.

Best of luck with either shoe tying or finding a great alternative.

Security Blankets May Be More Helpful Than You Think

Welcome to AuSumness.

Today, we are looking into security blankets and those items that your children find security and comfort in.  We'll answer these frequently asked question, Is this heathy?  Are there advantages?  When should you take it away?  

Confession, I just threw away my blanket 2 years ago.  Hehehe...I always had a blanket, for as long as I can remember.  My parents were pretty ok with it.  I suppose they had to be because there was no chance in hell I was going to ditch it.  I didn't take it to school with me and when I was older, I would totally keep it out of sight.  I just would stretch it across my pillow to sleep.  That's it. 

Now, my youngest (9) still has a blanket.  I get a lot of grief from family and friends about it, but I tell them they just have to deal with it because I'm not taking my son's blanket away.  He used to take it everywhere and always had it on his person, but recently he's cutting back.  If he set it down somewhere, I would sneak it away and just lay it back on his bed.  He was taking it in on the bus, but not into school.  Recently, he leaves it at home.  Yay!  I've repeatedly warned him the dangers of losing his precious blanket if he always took it with him, outside of the house.

You may also be able to gauge how stressed your child is by how much they are using their blanket.

I'm so glad I thought to take his rather large blanket and cut it in fours, years ago.  This way I could wash it very often and he would always have a blanket available.  We have lost one so far, but we've got three more to go!  He's been easing way back with it's use.  I totally understood what it was like to have a blanket, what it felt like when I didn't have it and that awful feeling when someone  picked on me for having it or even worse, when my brothers would tease me by taking it away.  Ugh!  JJ's big brother has been told just how evil this is and to never do it.  Hehehe...

So, is it healthy to have a security blanket?  You bet'cha!  

Having the ability to form a deep attachment to people is really important and this is a great way to get started.  These attachments leads the child to independence as well.  My youngest is very independent as am I.  We have no problems being alone and feeling comfortable with it.  

Blankets, dolls or stuffed toys are a great tool to help with transitions as many of you may have experienced with your Autistic children, transitions can be very difficult.  They certainly are for JJ and his blanket is there to remind him of the peace, joy and comfort of home.  Having his blanket to hold, cuddle, smell and even chew calms him tremendously when we are out and about or in the car.

It is not recommended to take or exchange a blanket or doll if the child is not willing.  Unlike a pacifier that can physically damage, a blanket or stuffed toy cannot.  By doing this you would demonstrate that deep attachments are disposable.  

If you breast fed your child, that blanket might help greatly with the transition of weening.

It's not often that you see the bride carrying her blanket down the aisle or your boss taking it out of his brief case before he starts his busy day, right?  Let the child decide when it's time.

Thanks so much for joining us.  We have a Facebook Group, if you'd like to be a part of the discussion. We'd love to see you there.  Feel free to comment here as well.

Best of luck with your everyday dealings and Autism.

If you'd like to see more of our entries, feel free to scroll through the blog or visit our Autism Board on Pinterest for even more help.

Tips For Feeding Sensory Disordered and Picky Eaters

Welcome to AuSumness.

On Monday's we talk about Autism and give you tips that have worked or work for us, to try and make your life a bit easier, across the spectrum.

Today, we're looking at eating and food sensitivity disorders.  Perhaps you go through the same thing we do and that is stages, stages and more stages.  In a way, it's a bit relieving to think, "Oh, it's just a stage."  Sometimes they stick around for a while and other times they don't last at all.

Keep it simple and give them choices.

If there are any qualities we've learned to apply to make everyone's life easier, it's patience, compassion, perspective and persistence.  I'd like to go into each of these just a touch. 

Patience was something I was not born with, but after having two kids with Autism, I'm getting really good at this one and I feel more at peace with myself and the kids are also less stressed because mom and dad are dealing.  It didn't come easy and it didn't come fast, but I did get there.  Showing your child patience is a super duper example behaviour.  You may even want to point it out occasionally. 

"JJ!  Toes are not on the menu!"

Compassion is what we need to feel when someone is in need.  Of course, everyone on the spectrum is different, but our youngest needs a lot of attention, around the clock, in most manners of life.  When we learn to be compassionate about helping people, it all gets so much easier and rewarding for all. 

Perspective is a totally cool tool to bring to the table.  I have never looked at life from so many perspectives as I have been the last 10 years.  I'm sure you've had times where you're looking at your Autistic friend, family or colleague and you're thinking, "What the...?"  We do this a couple of times a day, easily.  We are wondering where the heck they come up with these questions or why they found something funny or why they thought a date was so important that they remember it three years later, exactly.  Learning how to look at things or try at least to see things the way others do is a true gift.  We can learn so much by doing this and for everyone, really.

Persistence is crucial.  Do not give up on the things that matter.  For us it's sleeping, eating and school.  We do not give in on any of these.  It's really tough in the beginning, but it gets easier for everyone after a while.  There are so many battles to fight, that it's important to remember the ones that are most important so you're not fighting all of them.  Think of things that are most important and work with friends, teachers and family so that everyone understands all of them and sticks to it.

Let them cook or bake, too!

Apply all of the things above to your sensory disordered person.  Our oldest never wanted to eat.  He was very under weight and eating time was something we all dreaded.  While our youngest had such difficult sensory issues, it took ages to figure out just what he would and wouldn't eat. 

First, I can tell you, it gets better.  However, it is always changing and not always for the better, but it is better than what it used to be because we were patient, compassionate, persistent and we put ourself in our kid's place to try and figure out what the big deal was.

Do not give in to junk, junk and more junk.  Do not continuously reward with dessert.  I see that this is a big problem for a lot of families.  Obesity is there.  We all should know that sugary, processed foods are hardly even food and reap havoc on our bodies.  No one is better off.  If the only healthy thing a child likes is celery than just keep giving celery.

Fingers are fun.  Don't push utensil use.

Continuously introduce new foods.  Never stop doing this. Encouragement is huge.  Show by example.  Try raw fruit and vegetables.  Start off by giving a dipping sauce of honey.  This one worked great for us!  A fresh fruit tray with all different kinds of fruit and a small spot for dipping honey.  Then use less and less and then none, if possible.

Just leave things on the table.  Don't make a big deal when they eat something, if it's possible.  We noticed that when we weren't watching, the youngest would often try stuff.  Give the kids serious props for at least trying.  This is a huge thing.  Our oldest has this smell thing.  He is very, very sensitive to smell and often doesn't want to even try things because of the way it smells.  They always HAVE to try at least a tiny taste and that's it.  Try not to harp about it.  Just let the food sit there.

Cram the nuts and veggies, and fruit into muffins!

Gagging is an absolute sign to stop.  Never ever force.  Especially, if there is gagging.

We don't let anyone leave the table until their plate is clean or until everyone else is finished.  You may find kids want to get off of the table to go and do something and this will help prevent that.  We also reward, occasionally, extra game time when they eat something that they really didn't like.  A prop behind the door is sometimes necessary, but shouldn't be overly used.

Many folks have problems with sauce.  So just give plain pasta, rice or potatoes without it.  There are so many kinds of pasta you can buy that are healthy like quinoa pasta and gluten free pasta, too.  Think of all of the shapes and colours. 

Making food look fun or pretty will make it more appealing to eat.  We also give huge spoons or tiny plates to entertain and get them to think of other things rather  than the food.  Talk a lot.  Change the subject.  Try to laugh and make table time as enjoyable as possible.

Pay attention to what it is that they just can't handle.  Small pieces are often the culprit. I puree like crazy.  This way they get all kinds of vegetables, but there is no physical evidence.  Hehehe...Mix white vegetables like various beets, parsnip, cabbage...through your typical mashed potatoes.  Carrots and spinach are delicious mixed with mashed potatoes. This has been just magical for us. Make sure those chunks are not to be seen or felt, by using a mixer.  Staff mixers are great for this.

Remember or learn the basics of what a healthy person should be eating.  We really need a minimal amount of meat.  So don't push that.  Potatoes are certainly controversial and shouldn't be consumed often.  Bread is also a hot topic.  Fruit, vegetables, grains...these are things to focus on and make sure they are being consumed.

Soup, completely pureed is ideal.  You can put it in a sippy cup.  Serve it cold or warm.  So many options with soup.  

We've got a super blog with a lot more tips on getting picky eaters to eat good food.  Check it out, here.

To see all of our posts on Autism in one nice place, go to our Autism board on Pinterest.

Thanks so much for checking out AuSumness!  See you next week.

Autism And Pets

Welcome to AuSumness.

Every Monday, we post informative, fun and helpful tips on how to live more comfortably with friends and family with Autism.  We have two young boys with Autism, both on very different levels of the spectrum and we are on the quest to find ways to minimise the symptoms of Autism as well as learning from this experience to improve all of our lives.

Today, we were looking at various scenarios relating to pet ownership in a household where Autism is present.  We've had a very mixed experience and the research that I did on this subject came out extremely one sided, though not at all negative, which is exactly why we are here.  Sharing information that can't be found easily and putting it where it's easy to understand and can also be attained fairly quickly, thanks to high lighting the key points.

Keep reading to learn about our experience and get a very well rounded perspective of the possibilities of pet ownership in your family.  They say pictures speak a thousand words.  See for yourself.

As mentioned earlier, most of my research was very positive.  However, our experience has not all been positive, but certainly educational.  We'll explain what we found with each pet and you can put it all together and come up with your own conclusions.

The up side.  Pets are reported to bring a higher level of social interaction to children and adults with Autism.  Children can also become more assertive when exposed to household pets and other animals.  It's also reported that pets can reduce stress and calm people, too.  I would think that this type of information would ring true for just anyone, generally speaking.

Besides the cat, we raised hamsters.  When my youngest was just a toddler, he smashed it with his foot and laughed like a demon.  Yes, the poor thing died and I felt absolutely miserable and responsible. WAKE UP CALL!  This was certainly a call to arms and since then, we try our best to never let the animals alone with JJ.  As much as he loves and appreciates his pets, in a flash, he will try to hurt them.  Especially, if he is upset.  Ask yourself, if this could be a probability, because it isn't easy being vigilant and keeping a constant guard for pets and your special needs children.  Definitely consider the animal in your choice.

I've always had a cat.  Years before the children have been in the picture and we've been through half a dozen so far.  Overall, the experience with cats has been super.  My oldest continuously had scratch marks throughout his toddler years, but he loved the kitty and the kitty loved him, too.  My youngest who demonstrates a lot more Autistic symptoms, also does well with cats and all of our cats have done exceptionally well with him.  He has rarely been scratched.  There's definitely an indescribable relationship of understanding between them.

I can't say that he properly treats his beloved kitties either.  We continuously teach and reteach him how to handle animals and he still holds, too tight, too long treating them more like a doll than a living being. 

Cats do not seem to do anything that bother either of my boys, but I cannot say the same for the dog.  We took two years before we decided to buy a dog and were ridiculously cautious to the breed we chose.  We found that Labradoodles were probably the best for our boys, but didn't have the finances for that one.  The second best choice was a Bichon Frise.  That's this little, white guy pictured below. He's a pretty awesome dog, but he barks way too, much and this drives both of our boys nuts.  As much as my oldest claims to love his dog, he'll give him a pop without thinking twice. Just a couple of barks and they both get very irritated and start screaming.

How were we to know this?  The cats never gave the kids a reason to lash out at them besides the Lenny like hugs.  We do all we can to stop the barking and because of JJ's needs we are always in ear shot and keen to sense a possible situation before danger strikes, but what a lot of stress! 

In my opinion, special needs children are stress and stressed enough.  The dog just adds to that, but that is our children.  Your family might be completely different.  I just want to put it all out there so you are not surprised if something like this happens.  If you are looking for a small breed for emotional support, check out Michale's blog, Little Doggies Rule. 

You can see that JJ's loyalties lie definitely with the cat.  The dog tries very hard to get JJ's love and attention, but I must say, he rarely acknowledges the dog's existence!  It's really, quite a situation and sometimes sad.

My oldest has the best relations with the dog, but he can lash out almost as easily as JJ.  At times he can be inconceivably upset with the dog as well and gets frustrated at all of the work that comes to owning pets.  Both boys like the pets when it best suits them.  Put in a nutshell and simply said.

Don't expect your children to care for the animals.  Our pets would totally starve to death if we didn't constantly tell them what to do.  A schedule to stick with, might help better with this.  No game time until animals are attended to helps a lot in our house.  Even small chores are quite a hassle with us.  They always give way too much food and never take the initiative themselves, to help and care no matter how terrible we make them feel bout it.  Hehehe...If they are in the middle of doing something and we mention their poor doggies is starving, forget about it.  They can even refuse to help despite the threat that we will give the animal to someone who will care for it better.  It's sad, but it is what it is.  Empathy is unknown.

We've always had chickens and for the most part, it goes well with them.  JJ will certainly chases them around the yard and hassles them into a submissive cuddle, but his contact with them is more limited because they are outside and when JJ is outside either me or my husband is outside, too.  Though, I have seen him throw a chicken to see if it really couldn't fly.  So watch out!

We recently acquired a rabbit and this might go the best.  The rabbit is contained in a very large cage, outside so touchy feely time isn't all that frequent and it's always monitored.  Just like you see in the photo. It's just easier to monitor the rabbit more than any other pet.  It is also more difficult to access the rabbit due to it's physical enclosure, which helps  too.  I will add that rabbits are a surprising amount of work, which might also upset your child, if they are expected to lend a hand in its upkeep.

Both boys have admitted that owning a rabbit is a lot more boring then they thought, despite my warnings.  Taking Snuffie for a walk, on the other hand is rather enjoyable.

Another fabulous option and highly recommended is fish or an aquarium.  They both absolutely love the aquariums and there is little they can do to harm these animals.  There is a lot to teach them and they don't mind helping with maintenance, periodically.  Our only problem that we sometimes have is JJ banging on the glass to frighten them, but honestly, I can't think of the last time he has done that.  Of course, we did a touch of shock therapy to solve that one.  My hubby scared the crap out of JJ unexpectedly and told him that's what he was doing to the fish when he beats on the glass.

We have all kinds of tanks.  The most gorgeous fish are in the sea aquarium and this tank is constantly changing which draws the boys the most.  A crab or anemone can come from out of nowhere and that's pretty cool.  Our African Cichlid tanks always had babies and there is a lot of movement in there, too which grabs your attention and keeps interest. 

Now, you have our experience with Autism and pets and a lot of pets, at that!  Hehehe...I'd really love to hear about your experience!  I recently started a Facebook Group and would love if you would join it and tell us all about your experience with Autism.  I don't have a lot of friends whom I can chat with about this which gives me a fairly skewed interpretation and would I'd love to expand that by hearing other's stories.

Think long and hard before buying pets.  Assess your kids very thoughtfully and critically as well.  Perhaps even ask for outside advice incase you think you may be too, bias.  I would easily say that owning pets and having children with special needs is not easy.  It takes a lot of vigilance and patience and does have the possibility of heart break, but hopefully you've read about the positive sides of owning pets, too and have a very balanced idea of what would be best for your family.

Here are a couple more links if yo would like to read further:

https://www.disabilityscoop.com/2015/05/26/pets-reduce-stress-autism/20335/

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sciencetech/article-2895069/Are-PETS-key-treating-autism-Researchers-say-children-pets-far-better-social-skills.html

http://www.dogsforgood.org/wp-content/uploads/2015/06/Research-on-dogs-and-children-with-autism.pdf

Thank you so much for stopping by our blog.  We've got a Pinterest board for Autism as well as a Facebook Group if you'd like to follow us.

Best of luck!